Today (30-12-2013) is the 1st day without screaming out loud to my 1st toddler.
I’m bad tempered mother, everyday easily provoked to be emotional, angry, scream out often, n spank my 1st, 3 years.
He is often reluctant to play with his peers, shy to others, maybe he isn’t confident & afraid. He may learn to be close to somebody cud experience lot/often bad treatments, coz with his own mother, the closest person available most time in his life, he experiences bad treatments often.
I have hurt my 1st toddler’s emotional & mental a lot by my daily bad temper. He may be afraid to be close to any other people outside his family.
My 1st may also assume he cud behave anything he wants to others — learning from my treatments to him — to be emotional anytime, no need to pay attention to other people’s feeling & common order in any environments.
This morning (30-12-2013) I wake up feeling bad — it’s too much a long time I just realize the bad daily situation & the very destructive effects I have made — disappointed to myself coz yesterday I scream out loud a lot too much to my 1st, just 3 years.
Learn to be patient n creative how to handle n direct children in a quiet spirit.
I want to be an ordinary mother, just a small unnoticed people,who has heart & treats my children well, so they can grow normal mentally & physically, my only hope for 2014.
I will learn to be patient & creative how to handle & direct children, in a quiet spirit.
First by everyday no scream out loud, no spank, for a month (Jan 2014). I hope a month will be time enough time for me to form this positive habit for so long.
I made it.
Confessions 1-1-2014: 1x scream loud, 1x spank for cranky & stubborness.
Confessions 2-1-2014: 1x scream loud for long loud cranky crying.